“If it is not right, do not do it; if it is not true, do not say it.” Marcus Aurelius
This week I’ve been musing a lot on lying.
All children lie at some point, test boundaries, cover up accidents, try to cheat at games. Not being a parent I’ll never have to find out how best to handle this with small children to ensure they grow up to be honest adults.
Well, as honest as the average adult, who studies show lie 1-4 times a day (more often if you’re a man apparently).
The majority of lies made by the majority of people, are white lies for social cohesion, or omission lies, holding back information.
Carrying secrets on behalf of others can force you to lie, or else betray the person whose secret you hold.
Fear of negative repercussions resulting from a truth can also lead you to lie.
These are all common, recognisable and understandable ways we all lie, whether daily or less often.
But then there’s pathological lying - Pseudologia Fantastica:
Creating an elaborate false history of achievements or positive experiences
Falsely claiming to have a life-threatening illness
Fabricating dramatic events to attract admiration or sympathy
Interestingly, it seems there is still controversy and debate among psychiatrists surrounding definitions, causes and related pathologies.
Pathological lying is listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), although only as a symptom of other disorders such as antisocial, narcissistic, and histrionic personality disorders, not as a stand-alone diagnosis.
But according to Acta Psychiactrica Scandinavica “Pathological liars do not [always] show these antisocial behaviours; they may lie merely because they think their life is not interesting enough.”
Being constantly reminded of others’ fame, wealth, success and adventures on the old black mirror, is probably not doing much good for the mental stability or resilience of young people these days.
Cooking Course
All of Module 2 is now uploaded and I’m deep into editing several videos in Module 3 at once. Have even done the groundwork on all of Module 4 but honestly, I think getting those finished before the festival next weekend is impossible now so I’ll just be happy to get all of Module 3 finished.
Jiu Jitsu
Still not back to full training but have managed to get to classes this week.
Sherpa Journal updated their app and have reimagined the intention setting prompt but as I’m not back to rolling I haven’t had a chance to use this feature yet.
Amusingly, while doing some yoga the other day, realised I’ve unconsciously taken this terminology into my grappling practice without making any connection to yoga but for me the meaning is quite different than it is for yoga.
Whenever a yoga teacher talks in a class about intention setting, I pretty much dismiss it as it’s too vague an instruction for me.
However, for Jiu Jitsu it’s been a complete game changer. Training with an intention focuses my mind into a very specific area of attention and the gains from training this way can’t be overstated. It’s completely revived my excitement for practice, as well as reflection, let alone helping improve skill and understanding.
Feel like I’m still a beginner at setting and practicing with intention so I’m very interested to see how much better I can get at it.
Next Week…
Couple of days cheffing and will get to a few classes but otherwise just video editing until I leave to collect Dan from the airport on Friday morning.
Next week’s newsletter might be a pretty short one as I’ll be writing from the festival but I’ll do my best!
Have a great week 😊
I love the way you write x